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Not one to wait for anyone, I still went on dates, but I wouldn’t do more than kiss other guys, because it felt dishonest.After two (agonizing) months, Lucas and I finally got together.Despite Lucas’ emotional distance, it was clear that those two months of hot cybersex gave us a level of openness and intimacy around sex that some of my friends have never had, even with their spouses.It was incredible how easy it was to turn our virtual connection into real-life sexual chemistry.After a few weeks, he once again steered our conversation toward the X-rated (dick pics included).He told me he’d break me of my nice-girl ways, and I’d do things with him that I’d never do with anyone else.
It felt like we were two people who’d been dating for months — beyond the physical stuff, we were comfortable just sitting and talking. Because of all of the cybersex we’d been having, I was already comfortable with him.It soon became clear that Lucas wasn’t taking our relationship as seriously as I was, and I didn’t know how to protect myself emotionally in such new sexual territory.The moment I hit “answer” on my i Phone, I put myself in an extremely vulnerable position. By the end of the night, he had asked to take me out as soon as possible, and we had kissed and exchanged numbers. We were at a bar, and he was semi-cute, but very charming and funny.
The first time we got on camera, it was awkward, much like it is the first time you have sex with someone new.